Monday, February 14, 2011

Drag Me To Hell

I've never really resented Valentine's Day before.  Like Ramadan and Hanukkah, it was just a holiday that didn't apply to me.  If anything, I resented the implication that I ought to resent Valentine's Day.  I don't resent Chinese New Year, people. 

This year, however, it happened.  The resentment began building February 1st, when friends, relatives, and Internet folk began putting up decorations, talking about countdowns, and making ooey-gooey plans.

Criticism one:  It's not Christmas.  There's no countdown needed.

(Here's where I tried, but failed, to resist the impulse to write, "Do you people have a countdown to Easter?  A countdown to the celebration of the Atonement and Resurrection of our Lord?  Because I haven't noticed that on any blogs.")  (Alternatively: "Do you people have a countdown to Passover, a celebration of God's loyalty and the end of bondage?")  (And to the atheists: OK, you guys can have the holiday.  You don't believe in an afterlife, after all.)

(Too far?)

Criticism two:  Why do people in love get a holiday?  You get to be happy 365 days a year.  That's a whole lot of opportunities to be smug. Giving you an extra special day is like having Rich People Day or an Annual Celebration of Celebrity.

(Parenthetical in which I defend my reasoning against the inevitable, "What about Fathers/Mothers Day?" line of thought: Being a parent must suck at least as much as it is awesome, and therefore they deserve a day to tip the scales in their favor.  Also why Presidents get a day.)

So I decided to have a dinner party on Valentine's Day.  Not a Valentine's Day Party, not an Anti-Valentine's Day Party.  Just a party, something to look forward to other than romantic bliss or hater angst, in which my friends and I make (or order, depending on our level of enthusiasm) dinner and then watch a Sam Raimi classic.


  1. I tend to think of it a lot like you expressed the feelings towards parents deserving an extra day. Being in love awesome, but being in a long term relationship is also a lot of work, and thus having a day to be reminded that you do in fact love that person can be kind of nice, plus I am in favor of any holiday where I get stuff, because I am a greedy American like that.

  2. Yeah ... I hate to be disagreeable, but I find that "lot of work" argument a load of bunk. You always have a vacation buddy, you won't die alone, when you're sick someone else will make dinner, and when you don't have time to sort out your bills, someone else can do it for you, etc and so forth. Valentine's Day is just icing on your already ridiculously large cake.

    Sure, you can't leave your towel on the bathroom floor any more. Boo hoo. Parents get pooped on. Poop trumps all, and that's without adding in the fact that your kids will drain your financial resources for the rest of your life. Parents for the sympathy win.

    Sorry ;) You can keep the presents, though.

  3. People will tend to call you bitter - I know, been there and they GAVE me the t-shirt.

    Here's the thing - we don't celebrate this day [my husband and I] because we have 365 days to do this. Bringing me flowers on a whim or me putting a love note in his lunch is a helluva lot more romantic then busting loose on February 14th.

    We do try to make it fun for the kids - and make red dinner and a red dessert - but I cook specific foods for other holidays, so it isn't so different.

    ::scratching my head:: Spellcheck actually approved helluva, but won't take the red squiggly line out from under the word "Spellcheck". Sorry - just saying.

  4. I don't particularly care for Valentine's day either. Partially because I know there will be people on facebook that I'm still friends with for some strange reason who today will post something along the lines of "I have the BEST HUBBY in the ENTIRE WORLD!!!! I love Valentine's Day!!!!" And really, that's annoying. That was annoying when I was single and it's annoying now.

    My roommates put pink hearts up all over the kitchen. So gross.

    That's what Valentine's Day is. An excuse for annoying people to be more annoying. Whoop-de-do.

  5. LOL. Good on you for not resisting the urge to post those comments. I find them HILARIOUS.

    Personally, I NEVER had a boyfriend on that ridiculous day, I pretty much avoided having one around the holidays at all (sometimes by choice, sometimes that's just how things worked out) but really, it's just that much cheaper to not have to buy a damn gift.

  6. Slightly off topic, but Hanukah is a fun holiday! haha

  7. I'm laughing so hard and your undeniable criticism #2 logic, so true. Okay, I done lurking.