Wednesday, September 21, 2011

King Kong

Just in case you were thinking, "This girl does not talk enough about her dog," you're in luck! 

I bought the little pup a kong, which is a rubber toy you put treats inside.  The theory is the dog will be occupied with the task of getting the treat (cheese, peanut butter, whatever) out of the kong and not with destroying various valuables.

When I picked out the kong, I wasn't entirely sure it was going to work.  First, even though I picked out the "petite" kong for a dog under 20 pounds, the hole seemed awfully small and the rubber surprisingly unyielding.  How was Spence supposed to get peanut butter out of the bottom?  But I went with it, since hey, why would they make it if it were impossible?

Yesterday I was working at home and I needed Spence to just sit and chill for a few hours, so I filled the kong full of peanut butter (which, along with parmesan cheese, strawberries, grass, bees, pickled ginger and couch is pretty much Spencer's favorite thing to eat).  He promptly licked off all the peanut butter within easy reach, which took less than a minute, and then looked at me.

I looked at him.  "There's more peanut butter at the bottom," I pointed out.

He raised his eyebrows, which I took to mean, "Yeah.  At the bottom.  How am I supposed to manage that?"

"You know, get your tongue down in there."

Head tilting, which seemed to say, "That seems a bit undignified."

"Buddy, you lick your own soon-to-be-excised balls.  You can't be aggressive with a little rubber toy?"

"It's not a matter of aggression, it's a matter of probability of succe -- hey, what was that about my balls?"

"Never mind.  Look, give it here, you just squeeze the toy a bit and more peanut butter comes out.  You try."

"Umm, I'd rather not, but thanks for the additional peanut butter.  Now, why don't you just run along and get me one of those fantastic chicken flavored rawhides that takes thirty minutes to eat.  That will do, don't you think?"

"But I've got at least three hours of work where I'll need silence ..."

"Splendid.  Six rawhides it is."

(Yeah, that is pretty much how lawyerin goes with Spence.  Him wagging his tail, me coming up with possible dialogue.)

PS - Thanks to all my new followers, homies!  I'm pretty much tickled pink about being close to 200, though part of me wants to remain coolly indifferent.  But see above, where I wrote dialogue for myself and a five month old puppy?  Definitely not cool, so let's stop kidding ourselves.

Also, while we're being honest about the subject of obsessive checking my blog stats, if you are a follower who demands a follow-back (and I know you're there, since apparently I gained one and lost two last night), just comment on ye olde blog so I can find you.  I got behind a few weeks back amidst all this blogfesting and campaigning and whatnot, and despite positive intentions, never really got around to figuring out who my new friends are.

And while we're being exxxxxtra honest (that looks dirty, doesn't it?) I can't guarantee I will follow you back.  But I will check out your blog for sure, maybe even more than once, and if it is interesting to me and well-written (and surely it is, I'm not even sure why this disclaimer is here!) then I will follow. 


  1. yeeeaaah....that picture makes me giggle:-)

  2. Mind of Mine, Larissa, gotta say ... I'm not seeing it. Really messed up penis? Really messed up boob? What?

    To anyone out there, if any part of your anatomy looks like a kong, please, seek medical attention now. ;)

  3. I used to hate it when Rusty (my dog... obviously) would leave the unreachable peanut butter in his Kong and let the ants get it. Lose lose for me. I put cereal in it sometimes.
    And THEN when I really wanted to be nice to him I would get one of those rawhides and coat it in peanut butter and send him to heaven.
    He sure was glad I was HIS bi-ped.

  4. Yep, sounds like a puppy to me. They always know how to get what they want.
    I wonder if the Kong-people ever tested it with dogs, and if any of those dogs ever finished off their treat.

  5. I'm not seeing anything with the snack toy but... someone who didn't read this post from the very beginning - which would be rather stupid but there are plenty of stupid people so won't argue that point - would probably want to follow for the wrong reason. I've been following because, well, of quirky posts like this that make me laugh.

  6. I love your dog. I want to write a character half as colorful as him. That would make my nonexistent career.

  7. My dogs love their kongs. I only hate it when one sneaks a kong into the backyard and I must search for it. One of my dogs must have the Guiness World of Records length dog tongue. He licks every smudge of PB to the far recesses.

  8. Patty - that is brilliant, I'm trying that.

    Alex - seriously. I don't have much hope for Spencie's success.

    Claire - Spence likes it too :)

    Angela - thanks!

    McKenzie - Awww, I love him too. I feel quite confident in your ability to write someone just as sassy.

    Brinda - lucky dogs! Yeah, Spencer's tongue is not that advanced fo sho.

  9. My friend's Doberman had a Kong. Beware that if you step on one of them in the dark you will fall to the floor with a twisted ankle covered in E-Z Cheese. It happened to me.

  10. I never get tired of hearing stories about your dog. This one cracked me up because every dog I've ever known would have ripped that thing in half to get to that peanut butter. Well, except one dog my mom has now who would probably just give up and go take a nap.

  11. Julie: Awesome imagery.

    I was wondering about the peanut butter in the kong thing too. I read that putting kibble in it (for his breakfast or dinner) might work. It always looked to me like it would fall out fairly easily.

    It's kind of like a kong, but it seems like the dog would be able to tell the peanut butter is in there better. Also, very sturdy, apparently and eco-friendly.

  12. Or:

    I've been learning to live with dogs and train them, etc, lately, and I have a lot of extra time at work, so I have read WAY too much stuff. :)