Tuesday, September 6, 2011

My brains are scrambled

Hey ya'll, I'm back!  This is a totally non-scheduled, non-pre-written post.  Unfortunately, I don't have too much to say other than I'm fully committed to catching up by the end of the week, and that I've learned some life lessons while I've been away:

1. When you coordinate your tipping at a restaurant, make sure the other person knows what you're doing and not just checking your math.  At a ramen house on our last day in VacationLand, I asked my friend Ricky if $2.60 sounded good and he agreed.  I wrote that on my bill.  Then I watched him write $3.00 on his bill, making me the jerk who stiffed the waitress.  According to Ricky, he thought I was just double-checking my decimal moving skills. 

2. When you knock two people over at their airport, don't shout, "I'm about to miss my flight!" in lieu of an apology.  That's on everyone's mind at the airport, you're not special.  Plus, words about flights just blend together at an airport.  It took me five seconds of being mad about the whole assault angle before I processed what you said.

Additionally, you're going to look real dumb when you run into those same people when you're coming out of the ladies' room. Next time, just tell the truth.  I would definitely leap out of the way for someone screaming about diarrhea. 

3. Cheap trips are always best, and I don't regret my decision whatsoever to visit VacationLand for not-so-much-moola.  However, the next time, I think I will spring for whichever hotel doesn't have rock hard mattresses and leaves me notes on my door informing me that the room is going to be fumigated for my convenience on the morrow.

I like my fumigations to take place when I'm not there, personally.  Ideally, before I arrive.


  1. Lol! Sounds like you had a great time!

  2. Those sound like the memories meant to be forgotten so the vacation seems way peachy-keen.

  3. JA - I totally did!

    Angela - never fear, I like my vacations with a dash of awkward and uncomfortable :)

  4. Yikes! Fumigation. I hate looking for hotels (especially on the road) because you're quite never sure what you're going to get for what you pay. I think I might have it figured out now, though (Choice Rewards + always staying in the cheapest room in the Quality Inn). But seriously. Hotels. Eeeh.

    I'm always the awkward person figuring out the tip on my phone's tip calculator because I'm so afraid of doing the math wrong under all that pressure, and then being the jerk who (accidentally) stiffs the hairstylist/waiter/etc.

  5. Hi Ru,
    Found you on the campaign and I am absolutely following you now. Aside from what you may consider all mishaps. I love the way you described all these situations. I'm totally cracking up. Sorry for all the weirdness but the way you desceibe again TOO FUNNY!!!

  6. Alright so I am sorry for the reason I'm commenting...

    But in all seriousness, I was on a flight recently coming out of the gate, and some old lady was getting helped into a wheelchair semi-in the way of the rest of us exiting the plane. And some slight lady in a hurry pushed passed and uttered a similar line, and scurried off, and now all I can think is she probably had diarrhea. Thanks a lot for scarring her through my memory. :)

  7. haha, people at the airport are so smug. Everyone feels their flight/bathroom emergency is the more important than everyone else's. haha.

  8. Yes, diarrhea gives a person a whole lot of leeway in terms of airport etiquette. Actually, in terms of anywhere etiquette.

  9. Gosh Ru, your entries always make me laugh.
    One of my mother's biggest pet peeves is when people just slowly lumber through the airport at a snail's pace in front of her. She practically runs to get around them.

  10. I hope you had a great time. Fumigation notwithstanding.