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Friday, April 20, 2012

R is for red herring

But you already know what that is, don't you?  So I don't think I'll talk about them.

(In a way, this blog post's titles is, itself, a red herring.  GASP!)

As I was preparing my taxes a few weeks ago, a thought occurred to me. When we refer to the federal government, we say "Uncle Sam." So when I paid my federal taxes, I say, "Uncle Sam really screwed me over this year."

But when I pay my state taxes, shouldn't I shake my fist and mutter something like, "Damn you, Uncle Brigham"?  (Yes, shocking I know. "New Denver" is in Utah somewhere. Minds blown.)

I shared this theory with the roomies, along with my suggestions for other states. (Nevada = Uncle Kit. Massachusetts = Uncle Massasoit. Rhode Island = Auntie Anne. Hawaii = Aunt Liliuokalani. And so forth.) 

Hannah responded sadly that Uncle Sam hadn't been so bad, but Uncle Brigham had really taken things out on her this year. (References were made to Khal Drogo, if you know what I mean.)

All joking aside, I really think that we should all try to make this happen. I mean, once upon a time in New York, people decided to start abbreviating all their neighborhoods, and that eventually became a thing. (Last night as I helped him prep for trial, Diego kept referring to a town called "West Jordan" as "WeJo." I think we can all agree this would be a big improvement for the residents of WeJo. It just sounds way cooler.) If they could do it, why can't we?

What do you think the patron aunts and uncles of the 50 states should be? Or at the very least, will you commit to referring to West Jordan as "WeJo"?

6 comments:

  1. I think SoJo has more staying power than WeJo, especially with its similarity to SoHo.

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  2. New York could be Uncle Peter, after Peter Stuyvesant.

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  3. I wonder what Virginia would be? Uncle Patrick for Patrick Henry, maybe? Or do I clearly spend too much time in Colonial Williamsburg?

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  4. Ok, am going to admit that I have to google red

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  5. (oops, wasn't done) herring, as that's one of those phrases I get muddled about! Lol...aunt Hilary here in NY?

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  6. I thought WeJo was already a thing. Was I ahead of my time?

    I guess for California we could go with Uncle John for John Sutter. Which is kind of fitting because I have an Uncle John and he's always trying to get money from people.

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