2. Even when one area of your life is a bit of a disaster, it can still be shockingly difficult to make the decision you know will improve that situation.
3. How we see ourselves is generally more important than who we really are. When someone self-identifies with Dr. House, it doesn't really matter that you think of him as the Phil Dunphy-type. It doesn't even matter that you may be right. Given the opportunity to behave like Dr. House, he will.
4. Speaking of doctors, having one you actually trust is a phenomenal experience.
5. Living alone is all it is cracked up to be ... and more.
6. Mini-adventures (Bryce Canyon and Zions) and Mega-adventures (Destination Wedding and NYC) help make life sassy.
7. Remember on Arrested Development, whenever Michael would make a decision that finally got him away from his pathologically over-involved family, a choir would sing, "Free! Free at last!" And then Michael would inevitably return to the people who treated him so badly?
We could all die at any second.
Good, you made it. Now don't you want your whole life to sound like a chorus of, "Free! Free at last!"?
(This point is not about my family, fyi.)
8. This--RIGHT NOW--is the hottest you will be for at least the next 48 hours, and potentially forever. Dress accordingly.
9. A Blackberry is both a blessing and a curse.
10. When I was a kid, people would often tell me that success wasn't everything, that personal relationships are the most important thing in this life, and I believe that is true with all my heart.
But after being dumped for a welfare mom, I must say add this caveat: I may die alone, but at least I'll have money, bitches. Lots and lots of money.
11. Wanting to get tickets to Saturday Night Live is in no way a lame life goal to have.
12. At the end of the day, you bring your most humiliating experiences on yourself. Just own it.
Stats for the year:
401(k)s opened: 1
New books written: 0
New books started: 2
Boys dated: 6
(Fun fact: The boy who informed me he was an ex-felon on our first date was not the boy who dumped me for the welfare mom.)
Student loans paid off: ALL (Bwahahahahaha!)
Couches purchased: 2
Callings released from: 1 (Yay!)
Movies seen in theaters: 6
Existential crises: 3
Bars passed: 1
Docs reviewed: Let's not even talk about it.