OK, I know the last post was unnecessarily cryptic. My reasons were twofold: one, I'm naturally dramatic. Two, I didn't want an internet trail to lead back to me.
But with 24 hours of perspective, I've realized that's a bit silly. So here's what happened:
First (short, pithy, slightly exaggerated) Version: I am currently undergoing a background check in order to become a real grown up lawyer. An extensive background check. They tell you these investigators will dig up everything (I'm so sorry about all those contact highs in college, but honestly, what was I supposed to do about the tokers across the hall in the dorms?), though you never imagine that a missing library book might pose a problem.
The Second (longer, but more realistic) Version: During law school, I was on a journal. In the course of doing copywork (guh) I had to check out a book from the Marriott Library. Someone else was in charge of returning it when we were done cite-checking an article. Apparently that person never did their job.
So when the Supreme Court of Texas called the University of Utah to verify my graduation from law school, they refused to confirm or deny due to a $70 fine on my records.
The best part of this story is that the Registrar's Office didn't contact me about this snaffu until the SECOND time the Supreme Court of Texas requested the records. Who even knows when they requested them the first time. In the meantime, I look like someone who may or may not have flunked out of law school.
The next best part of this story is that I've already been waiting awhile for this part of the process to get over. In Texas (in contrast to Utah), character and fitness comes second, so I didn't bother filling out the forms until after I knew I'd passed the bar. (What? I didn't want to waste my time in case I failed.) Besides, I was told when Texas switched their Character and Fitness forms to a more stream-lined version, the background checks would go much more quickly. If this is "much more quickly," I can't imagine what it would be like if I had filled out the extensive version.
Ahem. Please don't take that personally, Character & Fitness Investigators Who Hopefully Never Find This Blog.
Something tells me when this part of the application finally goes through, those investigators are going to be taking an extra hard look at this little trouble-maker.